Jade & Rune's Nipa Hut !
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Our story and photo albums
This is us, Jade & Rune (our nick names) at our wedding.
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Jade & Rune's Nipa Hut !
Our story and photo albumsThis is us, Jade & Rune (our nick names) at our wedding. |
Instead of free Filipina pen pal addresses I had to buy a list of addresses from a fee based mail order bride catalogue. I did not believe in "mail order brides" and still don't. I just wanted to try writing a few Filipina pen pals to see if all I had heard about Filipinas, so called mail order brides, was true. Were they really into traditional family values and romance instead of career oriented radical feminism? I wondered if I could find a good loving wife on the other side of the planet who just want to love and be loved, to cherish and be cherished. If not a wife, I at least hoped to find some friends to write.
Jade and I began writing as just pen pals in 1995. We wrote for 1 1/2 years, before we actually met, when I flew to the Philippines to visit her and her family. I was there 3 weeks and her family graciously invited me to stay with them instead of a hotel or resort. The customs and morals being high in their culture, it would not be appropriate for a single, young lady to visit a man in another place like that. We almost always had a chaperone or several. We soon came to know the loving bonds we had develped by letter and phone calls were real and lasting. We had learned a lot about each other by letters without the physical and hormonal fog of interference that can cloud peoples reason sometimes. We knew we wanted to be more than friends. I asked her father if I could ask Jade to marry me, according to the Philippine custom. Her family approved and we became engaged after two weeks and then went to the Embassy in Cebu to begin the paperwork. I forgot to bring her letters with me to "prove" we had a authentic relationship to the Embassy, but after a brief interview they let us apply for "proof of capacity for marriage" anyway. Basically proving a real relationship and that neither of us were already married. There is a mandatory 10 day wait for marriage in the Philippines and a interview is needed for a Permit for Marriage. We went to City Hall and got our permit and premarriage interview just before I left the Philippines. A lot happened in that all-to-short 3 weeks trip.
I went back to the states and began waiting 4 months for the family to arrange the wedding details, get more paperwork done and to have the dress made. I returned to the Philippines in March of the following year. The wedding plans were to marry in a local church and hold the reception in the family home and yard right in her community for all to see. It was a huge event with over 300 guests and new, to me, relatives attending. (Each person invited brought 1-5 friends too) It was a huge feast for all, 5 large pigs gave their life for the feast, 3 roasted whole and two parted out for a variety of dishs. There was also countless fish and shrimp as well. Remarkable to me to see so many people in line for food and unlike Americans, each one had about 90% plain rice heaped on their plates with only tiny amounts of meats. Rice is the staple of the culture there and though plenty of meat was available, people did not gorge on it but just ate what they usually ate: mostly plain rice without even salt on it. It was a family style wedding with lots of children and no drinking except a mountain of cases of Sprite and Coke. I did was not into alcohol and want no drunks to mar my wifes wedding day so no one drank alcohol, at least till after we left for the honeymoon late. After we left the men broke out the Gilbeys Gin and the women and kids migrated to the house for karoke and dancing with the kids as usual for them at get-togethers. Even with airfare, wedding, gown, rings, etc marrying a Filipina there still cost less than a fraction of what an American wedding can run. We honeymooned at Virgin Beach Resort, Cebu then later on Bohol with the famous Chocolate Hills and then Panglou with white sand beaches and the famous House Reef. (You must try the snorkeling there to believe it!)
After our blissful, and all too short honeymoon, I went back to the states where I applied to INS to bring my wife to the US and began a 5 month wait. Jade used the time to complete CFO classes, get her passport, physical, embassy interviews, and other papers done. God blessed us in that it went faster than most (6-12 months) and then I went to get my lovely wife and bring her to our home in the states. Now, with the new K3 and K4 visas, one can apply for a visa to bring a bride home just like a fiancee visa and begin the paper work here while together including her children if she has some. Much better!
Some men may want to try the Fiance' Visa route and bring their lady to the US for up to 90 days to get to know each other before marrying. This is not the best way for many chaste and proper young ladies in Philippine culture. It is better to meet there, get to know each other there and marry there. We did it this way because Jade's family would never consider letting her go to the states alone with a stranger on a fiance visa. She was a virgin who led a very protected and moral life, closely knit with her family and guided by a loving father. I was never very close to my family, having come from a broken home. I gained a wonderful new family when I married Jade. I love them all and enjoy being with them, as well as helping them as we can. I told them right off I could not support them but would be happy to help them get a start helping themselves. They are an industrious peoples and willing to work so that is what they did. We help them with small enterprises now and then so they can earn a living in a tough economy there. I think my family is great there and they have had a much better life now because of us and we praise God for that.
It was hard at first for Jade to adapt to being without her family AND in a strange country, but she did. Her sister, and soon her friends asked us to find them a good husband too, so we started this site for them and other Filipinas. We named it after ourselves, our nick names, Jade and Rune but it is for the filipinas who are so wonderful and deserving of a happy marriage and good life. We have jobs to earn a living and did not want to try to make money off other peoples lonliness and unhappiness and we wanted to fight the "mail order bride" concept and stigma. So, we decided to do a free pen pal site and list online dating personals for people just to help people, not for money. Not everything in this short life needs to be done for money. The Lord said "Freely you have received, freely give". I have always loved that word, FREE. Don't you? We started our two page website site on a free host, Angelfire, in 1998 with less than 10 of Jades relatives and/or friends to list. Just by word of mouth over the years, we now have thousands of ladies listed. We never solicit listings, they find us. My wife's sister found a good husband from our site and ended up marrying a Registered Nurse also, like me, in Austria where she now lives happily ever after.... Since the site started it has been a blessing and a ministry for us. We've had only a comparitvely few problem ladies to delete over the years, yet many happy marriages. Only about 3 vitriolic complainers about what we do vs many hundreds of thank you notes. We love getting thank you notes and wedding pictures from happy couples, but for their privacy we do not publish them. Some may not agree with what we do and do not think men should see foreign wives. Instead of forcing people to follow their opinions they should just let people decide for themselves what they want to do in life, decide what is right for them!
On March 5th, 2002, just three days before our fifth anniversary, my lovely wife took the oath of citizenship and became a US citizen. Praise the Lord! It was a long road but worth it. Guess what, contrary to the doubters, she stayed with me! She really was looking for a good husband, not a stepping stone to America. We are very happy together and hope others can find a happiness like ours for themselves. Is a foreign born mate right for you? You decide for yourself in your heart and pray about it.
As our US culture becomes more decadent and the bitter, extremist feminists try to make all bow to their will, many men may choose to move to the Philippines and live in a tropical paradise with their lovely lady instead. That's a wonderful option for many, more and more are choosing it. The Philippines is a great place to live for many reasons. Is it right for you? Is a beautiful, loving, family oriented wife right for you? You decide for yourself! Many men from many countries live there now. It is better in a lot of ways and very cheap to live plus a great culture.
May the Lord bless and guide each one of you.
We no longer own the site, we gave jaderune.com to my brother-in-law in the Philippines. He sends us listings and manages the Philippine Children Orphanage and School Fund for us, where comission profits and donations go. We just help out writing coding now.
Recent events: my wife and I tried almost exactly 10 years to have a baby, then spring 2007 we found she had conceived! Praise God. However, about 2 months later I was diagnosed with stage 4, metastatic pancreatic cancer that had spread a lot already to many other sites. Many people are praying for me and I trust God for His best will to be done in my life. I know the Lord Jesus as Savior and have peace in Him. Whether I go home to be with the Lord or get to stay awhile with my wife and son, I trust Him to chose what is best and will be happy whichever He chooses. We were blessed to have a son born to us on 9/11/2007 and mother and baby are doing well. I am taking chemotherapy and hope to be around long enough to get our son on a good start and if God heals, be around for a long time. If God gives healing or remission, we hope to go on a medical mission trip to the Philippines and help orphanages and poor people in the Cebu area. A doctor and other Christians have offered support already. We plan to breed my AKC Golden Retriever and sell the puppies to pay for airfare.
I have always wanted to go on a mission since becoming an RN but never did. If God wills it, I will go on at least one before I check out of this life. I was an Oncology RN for 6 of my 17 years of nursing and know the score well, now I know more about how my patients feel. Chemo is not fun. I do it for Jadee and Chris and have already been given a long repreive which I am thankful for. Jade has been a stable rock of support and love through it all. I am so thankful for her.
If I am to stay, praise God, if I break camp here and go home, praise God. If we cannot go on a mission trip I will send Jade to do it and to God be the Glory. If I go home, I will seek a Christian to take over our free site and continue the work of helping couples find each other and love as well as help orphanages and school kids.
Here's albums with some family pictures and our baby picture album from day 1 in the hospital till current.
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